I stood on the scale at home which read 196. I put 16 pounds of weights on it last night to see if it registered accurately. It did. I'm not going to put too much stock into that number because I know my weigh in at weight watchers isn't for another 4 days, and I know that our scales aren't all created equal. I did smile when I saw the numbers though, and I will not lie about that. For once, when I step on the scale it isn't teetering on the edge of 200.
Before I had my daughter, I weighed 195 pounds. I always had curves, and hated them. I wanted to be a stick. I wanted someone to look me up and down, and see nothing but a straight line. I wanted smaller boobs, a smaller waist, and non existent hips. The hips that poke people when they touch you. Luckily, I'm not that girl anymore. I am learning to embrace my curves. I'm trying to find a way to love them, instead of hate them. So far, I'm doing a pretty good job. I'm dealing with the fact that my daughter made my boobs even bigger than they were before. I'm dealing with the fact that she also pried my hips open on the day she was born. My waist is down a lot from when I first started this journey, and that's the first thing I've noticed. Since January I have lost around 4-5 inches off my waist. That's huge for me. Now, I am trying to get my hips to be a little curvier, and a little less pudgy. Wish me luck on all of that!
As for today. Well, I'm proud today. I'm proud that I'm sticking to my guns. I'm proud that I'm continuing on my journey with weight watchers, and trying my best not to give in to the Easter Candy. I am trying to replace cookies and chocolates, with w.w. pretzel thins, yogurts, and bananas. I am trying my best, and it's starting to show. I am also excited to say, that I have not put on a pair of "mom jeans" in over a week. That's right, this week all of my pants have sat at hip level! This is a huge accomplishment for me. I always hid behind my mom jeans before.
I feel like, I am seeing myself for the first time. I think that every time I look in the mirror, I am seeing my honest to god self. I am no longer seeing the fat girl. I am no longer fighting to hide behind long baggy shirts, mom jeans, and black overalls. Okay, I never wore black overalls but you get the idea. I am proud to look in the mirror and be happy with what I see. No, I'm not at my goal weight, and I don't even care. Imagine how happy I'll be to get there, when I'm already so excited to be just a few pounds thinner. I am doing this for me. I am doing this the right way. I'm not taking diet pills (like my husband) or cheating on plan. I am getting my ass up and moving, even if its just a 30 minute walk a day. My booty is on the couch less, the computer less, and spending more time running around with my daughter. I chase her around the house, we play outside, I take her for walks, we go to the park. I do whatever I can to get in a little movement. I will be starting Jillian up again soon, but honestly I don't know when.
So today, I feel like a brand new person. Today, I notice the changes that I'm making are actually working. Today, my stomach will growl to tell me I'm hungry, and I will eat a healthy snack. Can I do this for the rest of my life? God I hope so.
Here are a few recent progress pictures.
I'm not particularly fond of the little bit of hip that sits on top of my jeans, but
I'd like to believe I've come a long way. My waist is currently down
one whole inch since starting w.w. and my belly is down 1/2 inch.
Peace, Love, and Grocery Day